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Saturday, February 28, 2015 |  Madison, WI: 1.0° F  Fair
The Daily
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Tell All: How can I coexist with my intolerable roommate?
'I live with a fat, lazy pig'

Dear Tell All: I could relate to "No Sex in a Messy Room" (12/13/2012), in which the girlfriend of a guy named Dirtball refused to have sex with him until he cleaned up the house. I too live with a fat, lazy pig. When my roommate isn't at work, she is on her fat ass in front of the TV. The sight of her slumped on the couch irritates me so much that I spend most of my time at home in my area of the apartment. Dirty dishes will sit in the sink for days; laundry will sit in the dryer for days. Once, she left a frozen-food package in one side of the sink for three days before I got tired of looking at it and threw it away.

Things accumulate all over the apartment: receipts, packaging and plastic pieces of junk. In fact, her idea of cleaning seems to be throwing things into a bag or box and putting them in a spare room. Her only interest other than the TV is to go out on weekends with her boyfriend (what he sees in her I have no idea). Since she pays a larger share of the rent, I can't ask her to leave.

As far as I can tell, she has always been a slob, and I don't expect her to change. I was hoping for your advice on how to tolerate her until I can find another place I can afford.

Mr. Clean

Dear Mr. Clean: Since you can't reason with your roommate, and you can't afford to move out, your only choice is to devise a strategy for getting her out of there. The key, I think, is the boyfriend. You have to make life unpleasant enough for her that she spends most of her time at his place. And judging from what you've said, the best way to do that is to disable the TV in some way. Hire an electrician if need be. It will be worth the expense.

Readers, feel free to offer other ideas for helping out Mr. Clean.

Do you have a question about life or love in Madison? Write Tell All, 101 King St., Madison, WI, 53703. Or email

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