MOBILE USERS: m.isthmus.com
Connect with Isthmus on Twitter · Facebook · Flickr · Newsletters · Instagram 
Sunday, September 21, 2014 |  Madison, WI: 56.0° F  Overcast
Collapse Photo Bar

I just lied to a Jehovah's Witness

If it doesn't fit anywhere else, it fits here

Will I go to hell for this?

Yep, don't pack a sweater
1
3%
Nope, it's expected to lie to them.
5
17%
All you did was lie, can you imagine what Blunt woulda done?
24
80%
 
Total votes : 30

Postby bassbari » Thu May 27, 2004 1:28 pm

We used to call them "Jack Mormons" in Arizona. Ususally hot sex especially the 20 YO elders.
bassbari
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 1298
Joined: Fri Feb 07, 2003 4:47 pm
Location: ON YOUR LEFT

Postby nickled&dimed » Fri May 28, 2004 2:13 am

Bette wrote:I'm wondering what nickled&dimed would do...


well, i haven't had the chance lately. My mom (we're cut from the same cloth) Started discussing Unitarian Universalism (religioun without a creed) with them in the door, and they were discombobulated. When they got to the morman 2 doors down (oddly enough, my mom's best friend) she invited them in for coffee and they started talking smack about the Unitarian lady. The morman lady announced that was her closest friend, a spiritual person, and she didn't agree with them at all.

the quiet stirring of coffee ensued.

If he was cute, i'd invite him in for coffee an keep saying "Isn't it hot in here?" and see how many pieces of clothing I'd have to remove before they left.
nickled&dimed
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 2032
Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2004 11:19 am
Location: midwest. not madison

Postby white_rabbit » Fri May 28, 2004 7:21 am

nickled&dimed wrote:If he was cute, i'd invite him in for coffee an keep saying "Isn't it hot in here?" and see how many pieces of clothing I'd have to remove before they left.


I like you.
white_rabbit
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 7487
Joined: Wed Feb 05, 2003 11:44 pm

Postby nickled&dimed » Fri May 28, 2004 10:13 am

white_rabbit wrote: I'm not sure which is more strange, the Mormon Missionaries part or the gay bar in Escanaba, MI part.


I don't even know how you could see the gay bar over the tops of all the pick up trucks.


Not that there's anything wrong with that.... (pick up trucks, that is).
nickled&dimed
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 2032
Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2004 11:19 am
Location: midwest. not madison

Postby kurt_w » Fri May 28, 2004 10:24 am

white_rabbit wrote:I'm not sure which is more strange, the Mormon Missionaries part or the gay bar in Escanaba, MI part.


It's not Escanaba, but there's the "GAY BAR & GRILL" in Lake Linden, up on the Keewenaw peninsula. Well, the postal address is Lake Linden, but it's really in Gay.
kurt_w
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 5083
Joined: Tue Jul 22, 2003 3:11 pm

Postby Kyle Motor » Fri May 28, 2004 12:17 pm

I used to play in a band with a guy who's Jehova's Witness, all the girls liked him best. The rest of us decided it was what we dubbed the "Forbidden Fruit" effect....they couldn't have him, so they wanted him more.....never mind he was probably better looking than the rest of us, that had nothing to do with it.
Kyle Motor
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 3270
Joined: Tue Dec 03, 2002 1:48 pm
Location: Rock'n'roll crazy nights

Postby blunt » Fri May 28, 2004 12:21 pm

I kind of like the young men in suits riding bikes.
They dress nice. Like the Nazis.
But they're Mormons. They believe in flying saucers.

I don't know.
Religion has been lying to us for so long, isn't it our turn?
blunt
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 8246
Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2001 6:19 pm
Location: Right behind you.

Postby cattyr » Fri May 28, 2004 12:43 pm

Y'know, one thing the Jehovah's have going for them is this whole Tues/Thurs meeting deal. My co-worker is a Jehovah, and whenever she travels she can meet people easily by going to services...getting the inside scoop on whatever city she happens to be in.

Is it anyone else's experience that when not "witnessing" that these darn Joe Hoovers are some of the nicest people you've ever met?
cattyr
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 2457
Joined: Wed May 08, 2002 2:12 pm
Location: DPF dumdum!

Postby blunt » Fri May 28, 2004 12:53 pm

They are nice.
Lately, I've been letting them in.
You know that strange tickly feeling like butterflies in your stomach you used to get at the shoe store when the salesguy would gently handle your foot as he measured it in that huge metal kidney bean foot measuring thing?
Or that gooshy fuzzy feeling you get from that McDonald's commercial where that little girl gives that creep old guy a bit of her burger?

That's what listening to Jehovah's Witnesses is like.
blunt
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 8246
Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2001 6:19 pm
Location: Right behind you.

Postby emmy » Fri May 28, 2004 1:24 pm

I've done the "pretend you're deaf" thing twice, and got away with it. But the best was when I told the two that I had my own "personal" Jehovah, 'cuz my daughter was dating one (which she actually was), so I didn't need them to telll me all about it. . So they looked VERY surprised and said "Oh really? Who?" So I told them his name. Well, turns out they not only KNEW him, but ran off and told his MOTHER. I tell my daughter about it, she freaks out, tells me they're in BIG trouble now, 'cuz he's not supposed to date "outside" his religion. Well, he's a big time partier, his sister's the biggest slut in town, what harm could dating my daughter do? Well, a lot, apparently. I actually got a phone call from his mother, this guy's 19 at the time, BTW. She wants to know where I got the idea HER son could possibly be dating my daughter. That he only has "friends" outside of church. Riiight. I said, "So what if they ARE dating? What's wrong with my daugher???" Boy was I pissed. I never liked this kid, my husband caught them doing more than they should have been doing at her age, and she's giving ME the old holy roller act?? HA!! Luckily for all involved that DID break them up. "Mission" accompished I guess. HA!! :)
emmy
Forum God/Goddess
 
Posts: 646
Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 11:58 am

Previous

Return to Catch All

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

moviesmusiceats
Select a Movie
Select a Theater


commentsViewedForum
  ISTHMUS FLICKR

Promotions Contact us Privacy Policy Jobs Newsletters RSS
Collapse Photo Bar