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Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

If it doesn't fit anywhere else, it fits here

Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Sandi » Wed Feb 06, 2013 10:27 am

Reading a few responses in the "Gun Thread" I couldn't help but recall this blog post.

====================================================

Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… …….

Democrat’s Answer:
· Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question!
· What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
· Does the man look poor or oppressed?
· Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
· Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
· Could we run away?
· What does my wife think?
· What about the kids?
· Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
· What does the law say about this situation?
· Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
· Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
· Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me?
· Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
· If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
· Should I call 9-1-1?
· Why is this street so deserted?
· We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
· Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
· I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
· This is all so confusing!

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… …….

Republican’s Answer:
BANG!

………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… …….

Southerner’s Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click….. (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click
Daughter: ‘Nice grouping, Daddy!’
‘Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!
Son: ‘Can I shoot the next one?!’
Wife: ‘You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!
Sandi
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby fisticuffs » Wed Feb 06, 2013 10:32 am

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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Sandi » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:05 am

fisticuffs wrote:http://www.thedailypage.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=40&t=57019


For any particular reason?
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby fisticuffs » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:11 am

Because you clearly demonstrated the "party of stupid". Instead of dealing in reality and facts you rely on chain emails, limericks and bumper stickers. There is absolutely nothing of value in your post. None.
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Endo Rockstar » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:21 am

What the shit?

Did I just read a Fwd:Fwd:Fwd: from my aunt?

Sandi, apologize and get in the corner. Now. You can't come back to the internet until you're responsible enough to use it like an adult.

-Dan Motor
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Prof. Wagstaff » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:23 am

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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Endo Rockstar » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:30 am

Prof. Wagstaff wrote:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCSA7kKNu2Y


Thanks a lot Prof. Now I'm listening to Weird Al's entire calalog on YouTube.....

-Dan Motor
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby green union terrace chair » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:31 am

What category would this response put me in?
- Why is a "terrorist" attacking random people with a knife in the middle of the street? Has that ever happened in this country before? Am I in the middle of some fever dream or perhaps uncle's email forward? Wake up! WAKE UP!!
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Prof. Wagstaff » Wed Feb 06, 2013 11:35 am

Endo Rockstar wrote:Thanks a lot Prof. Now I'm listening to Weird Al's entire calalog on YouTube.....
I can think of a lot of worse fates. Imagine having to read Sandi's posts, for example. {shudder}
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Stebben84 » Wed Feb 06, 2013 12:01 pm

Prof. Wagstaff wrote:I can think of a lot of worse fates. Imagine having to read Sandi's posts, for example. {shudder}


Apparently she couldn't get a rise out of the two people who read her other forum.

I'm just wondering what political part the southerner belongs to...
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby snoqueen » Wed Feb 06, 2013 12:04 pm

Our trolls are getting dumber. What could this signify?

a) Isthmus no longer qualifies as prime trolling grounds and they've all moved to Madison Newspapers and a variety of blogs;

b) the golden age of trolling has passed and we're just getting wannbees and copycats;

c) due to some recent electoral losses, funders are re-evaluating their strategy and trolling doesn't pay as well as it used to;

d) reason has finally prevailed and stupidity, along with the party of stupid, has melted away like a March snowfall.

I know it's not (d).
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby gargantua » Wed Feb 06, 2013 12:20 pm

If there were one, Sandi's post would occupy an honored place on an "Isthmus's Dumbest Posts" thread.
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Michael Patrick » Wed Feb 06, 2013 12:25 pm

gargantua wrote:If there were one, Sandi's post would occupy an honored place on an "Isthmus's Dumbest Posts" thread.


Or perhaps an entire wing.
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby rabble » Wed Feb 06, 2013 2:32 pm

Sandi, seems to me that your writing style and substance has undergone a marked change in the last few months or so.

Believe it or not, I actually hope you're okay.
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Re: Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Postby Sandi » Wed Feb 06, 2013 2:35 pm

fisticuffs wrote:Because you clearly demonstrated the "party of stupid". Instead of dealing in reality and facts you rely on chain emails, limericks and bumper stickers. There is absolutely nothing of value in your post. None.


It is humor, which is sorely lacking here. Of course I should have known because, unlike other sites, this forum lacks a "humor" forum.
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