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Mature man standing on deserted sidewalk at night, portrait
Dear Tell All: I was driving home from a movie at Sundance with my 11-year-old daughter and was low on gas. I pulled into the Shell station on University Avenue, even though it looked deserted and I had misgivings. This was about 10 p.m.
As I filled up the tank, a man veered off the sidewalk and came toward me. He was raggedy and middle-aged, and I thought he staggered slightly, as if drunk. To be honest, it all happened so fast I'm not exactly sure what I saw.
I don't know if what I did next was appropriate or an overreaction. I put out my hand and shouted "stay back!" That startled him, and he seemed to change course and head into the station's convenience store.
It's possible that's where he was headed anyway. More likely he was approaching me to ask for spare change. Or maybe he wanted to rob me, or worse. In any case, I was relieved that nothing happened, even though my heart was beating wildly.
When I got back into the car, though, my daughter got very mad at me. She was horrified that I'd been rude, and that I assumed he was up to no good. That made me feel guilty. I tried to explain why I did what I did, but the more I talked, the more ridiculous I felt, especially since nothing had happened.
Did I set a bad example for my daughter?
Molly M.
Dear Molly: There is no reason to feel guilty in this case. When a suspicious man approaches a woman late at night in a deserted place, it's no time to worry about hurt feelings. It's time to take every necessary precaution. It's also a time to explain a few things to your daughter about strangers who get too close.
Do you really need an advice columnist to tell you "better safe than sorry"?
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